Lekhny composition -30-Dec-2021

                                         PAIN.

Very recently happened to go through a peculiar sentiment in life. Never had experienced such a unique and strange feeling. All this while I grew up thinking pain is something that affects us physically.  Usually felt incredibly happy to express my physical pain before Mumma. 

‘Mumma, my stomach is aching, my head is painful, my legs are hurting.’ Just my words would come out of my mouth, and my mom would shower all her love and her treatments over me. The amount of pampering I would receive would drive away the pain in no time, but my Mumma’s care and coddling would not stop. I always saw my pain shifting into her eyes.

I would see her in more suffering when I went through the pain. I never came across a pain that would break me down until I lost my mom. She always stood as a pillar behind me. She stood in my service day and night when I needed her.  My mom, who would answer to my whispers even in her deepest sleep, now, no more answers to my painful shrieks and yells.

           Today I know the real meaning of pain. Pain is not when our body aches and recovers later. Pain is when we do not know what is hurting. Pain is not only physical; it is the one that fragments the soul even. It empties our hearts and creates a vacuum that pulls every happiness into it. It makes us an empty capsule. Tears never dry up. Nobody can ever console us. It melts away the soul bit by bit. The loss of my mom created such a giant whirlpool in me that I lost my identity. This pain is so unique in its type that I do not want to recover from it. I want to be lost in her memories, and the world seems so meaningless after her. Every love seems so selfish. This pain has no medicine, no relief, and it increases every passing day. The world tells me to be patient, but mom didn’t teach me how to be patient without her. Now I know what the ultimate pain is. It is the melting of the soul every day, bit by bit, till the whole body gives up. Now my physical pains do not trouble me at all. They touch and go.

With mom around, even the darkest nights shone brightly.

With mom around, even the highest mountain seemed hillock.

With mom’s touch, even the immense ache vanished.

With mom’s blessings, even the most arduous task became manageable.

With mom’s support, I felt I could conquer the world.

But now, after her,

The brightest day seems so gloomy,

To keep walking in the path of life is like the most laborious task,

Even the slightest pain leaves an ugly scar,

With the whole world at my feet, everything is so meaningless.

 This suffering is the real meaning of pain.

NOOR TABASSUM.

IG ID - @noortabassumali123